realisation

today i relised its 41 days and then its 4 years.
4 years have gones so fast, although its seems like a lifetime.
i miss everything and how it was then.
already dreading the next 41 days.

life

life:

We all are given a life, we all decide what we want to do with it.
We all are given opputunites and we all have different lives.
What do you want to do with the your life?
Why not make it something that people stop in admiration and amazement.

Nearly holidays.

woo, for lazy days. yeep the days when you have absolutely nothing to do.. but doing nothing is so damn good. haha,
school is nearly officially finished for the year :D.
yesterday- i was meant to go to sydney for an excursion but it got cancel so i ended up going back to my friend jeems place hanging there with her and gub gub.
today- i had my visual design excursion, went into newcastle and flew our kites we designed. Day was okay.. got out of classes on the plus side.
Thursday (tomorrow), Friday and Monday- i have peer support training. Which meaans three days of activities.
Tuesday- okay.. dreading much but its one day of school work, hopefully classes will be pretty cruizey as its nearly the end of the year.
Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Monday, Tuesday- wooo for end of year activities and adventure challenge ;).

tonight i am not working so my plans is to read the amazing series, 'The Vampire Dairies' which i am loving. The tv show is pretty damn awsome too!

Cant wait for the holidays!

to my dear bestfriend jess

(to dear jess, hopee you read this).

I thought about you today, it brought me to tearswhen i relised how much i missed you. my amazing bestfriend. Its your formal tonight and you are gonna look beautiful, drop dead gorgeous, and i am sorry and so disapointed i miss seeing you get your photos. Lately ive felt like i havent been there enough, you've help pull me through some tough times, times when i was at rock bottom and you've had me in endless smiles and laughing until my stomach hurts.
Your the one person i can say i honestly trust, with everything, with all. Your an amazing girl inside and out and i would be lost without you.
I wanted to ring you tonight and vent this all to you, but you'll be dancing the night away and creating endless memories.
we need a day, a sleepover, a little holiday trip, a dance off, an adventure, a movie night: or all of these thing because i miss you, so much. And it feels like a million years since i had a proper conversation with you or saw you for that matter..
Im in tears writing this, cause i feel like somethings are changing and i hate not having my daily chats or spending my day consumed of laughter with you. Or making up silly dances and having endless rambles and dnms.
Jess Thomo, pretty much 'bestfriend' sums it up :).

oh i never got any messages about gundy :S funnyly enough and i had credit then, now i dont.. :( when i get credit expect a text okay!

ILY :) x

I wrote a poem to you today..

I wrote a poem to you today,
i didnt like it so i through it away.

I wonder where, i wonder how,
its so different now.

I remember the days when you were here,
almost every time in brings me to tears.

I wish how things could be the same,
all thats left is memories and a picture in a frame.

I wish i could of help and change what happened..

emotions.

Doesnt it amaze you how some people just couldnt care, until the tears start rolling down your cheeks.
and how other people can sense something up and they are their in a heartbeat.

Just a thought..

Memories

If memories were..

What if memories were like a flame, eveutally the wither and die out, only leaving ashes behind.
What if every great moment you share or had was gone in five years time.
What if, what seemed to mean everything suddenly meant nothing at all.
What if the one memory you swore you'd never forget went away and didnt come back again, left alone and forgotten.

What would you do if your memories were slowing dieing out and all you had left were another person opinion of what happened that day.
What would you do, how would you feel if the memory of someone you loved began to slowly fade.
What would you say, how would you act if you knew it wasnt coming back.
What would you do to make everything be the same and for that one memory to come back.

How would you act if you forgot your favourite memory.
How would you feel if you forgot the comforting words, the smell of the air, and the sweet sounds.
How would you cope if you lost the memory you loved the memory you inspired to one day be.

What would you do if memories were like flames, in the moment the feel like they could last forever, high up in the sky leaving an impact on earth, but eventually die out only leaving behind its remains..